8 unexpected erogenous zones that need your attention
In case you've been living under a rock for the past two decades, let's refresh your memory with that iconic scene in Friends where Monica explains to Chandler that he's been missing out on not just one or two, but seven other erogenous zones.
And that goes both ways, by the way. Both men and women have their own erogenous zones — and some of them overlap.
But these are not just foreplay ideas.
These eight zones get you to the big O in a more long-lasting way. In fact, finding and activating touch serves not only as foreplay, but it can also deepen your intimacy. Says sexologist Jess O'Reilly, "the entire body is an erogenous zone". And, according to studies, 33% of women enjoy 5-10 minutes of foreplay while 31% enjoy 10-20 minutes.
So how do you activate and locate these pleasure areas? Follow this guide to eight "unexpected" erogenous zones and add them to your list of new things to try in bed.
The Lower Back
In general, the rule of thumb — or, in this case, of back — is pretty simple: the greater the number of nerve endings, the greater the sensation, and greater the possibility of stimulation. This makes lower back an unexpected erogenous area.
Strokes on the lower back are directly related to the series of nerves within the spinal cord and vertebrae. In fact, of women with spinal cord injuries in various regions of the spine, only 17% were able to achieve orgasm as compared to 59% who had SCIs located in areas other than the lower lumbar spine.
Okay, the nipples get a lot of airtime when it comes to foreplay tips.
No pun intended.
But the color-tinged area around the nipples is just as useful in a little nipple foreplay. While scientists rank the areolae as the least sensitive areas in relation to the nipples themselves, the clitoris and even the side boob, the areolae on a woman are still a part of the entire routine of touch and stimulation.
Nape of the Neck
Worthy foreplay tips should include directions on the nape of the neck because this area is an arousing one for both males and females.
Responsive to even the lightest of sensations of touch and temperature the nape of the neck is the back area, leading upwards toward the base of the ears.
Like the base of the spine, the base of the neck can be stroked and "activated" using breath, touch, and even hot and cold sensations. Sensations on this area will travel to the rest of the body so don't be surprised if these foreplay tips make her — or him! — tingle.
Outside the Vaginal Opening
Everyone always goes for the clit — but did you know that you can wreak plenty of havoc using the labia?
These folds of skin are also loaded with nerve endings and, while they're intended biologically as, ahem, shall we say, "protective reinforcement", running your fingers around these while also stimulating the clitoris is a surefire way to get her going — and one of the most effective foreplay ideas for a stronger orgasm.
Back of the Ear Lobe
The back of the ear lobe has the potential to be one of the best foreplay ideas for erotic touch. To stimulate this area, you can use your fingers or include it in your make-out session to get things really steamy.
The ears are delicate but hearty and are connected to your face, which has its own set of nerve endings. Use with caution because this one could really get things going.
The Inner Thighs
For a woman, the inner thighs are more areas of anticipation than actual stimulation. They're torturously close enough to her genitals that she can imagine the action getting closer. But they're far enough that she's simply trapped in the waiting.
It's not one of those new things to try in bed but it's certainly one that works every time. Consider adding this to the repertoire using light kisses or even temperature.
Treasure trails, on both men and women, are called as such because they lead to, well, the promised land.
These areas are also close to the pubic bone which comes with its own set of nerve endings and are close to both male and female genitals. You can cause massive sensation by using temperature, but your touch will have to be more insistent, deeper, rather than lighter touch.
For both men and women, the feet are areas that are ripe for more than just pleasure touch. The feet include areas that connect to the rest of the body. In reflexology, these stimulating areas can cure headaches, relieve muscle aches, stress, and tension, and even smooth out kinks in the kidney, and more.
So, it's no surprise that you can use the soles (him) or the toes (her) for a little sexual arousal.
If you're skilled enough and light but insistent with your touch, you can give your partner a little foot massage. But you can just as easily earn his gratitude and her gratification if you run something scintillating like a silk cloth, a feather or your own fingers across these areas.
Tread lightly, though. This could easily become a tickle-fest.
Armed with this roadmap, you can deepen layers of intimacy and pleasure. Keep in mind that variety is both the spice of life as well as foreplay tips. There are three ways to stimulate sensation and pleasure when it comes to touch: light touch, deep touch, and temperature.
As long as it's safe and you have consent, consider mixing up your "technique" and involving all three kinds of stimulation to any of these eight erogenous areas.
And remember, erogenous zones can be non-physical. While you're looking for new things to try in bed, have you ever considered how sexy a good intellectual spar or discussion can be? Engaging with one another in deep, meaningful conversation or some intelligent, witty banter can arouse you or your partner just as much.
The truth is that you don't have to confine yourself to new things to try in bed — you can just as easily get each other going through other forms of physical exertion. Rock climbing, swimming, and even yoga — there's no limit. So, pick your favorite activity — or area — and get going!
Alexander, Marcalee Sipski, and Lesley Marson. The Neurologic Control Of Arousal And Orgasm With Specific Attention To Spinal Cord Lesions: Integrating Preclinical And Clinical Sciences. 2019.
Writer: Ms Gauri Lokare